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 I quit all my online games but I miss my friends from games

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zelda11



Posts : 1
Join date : 2013-03-09

PostSubject: I quit all my online games but I miss my friends from games   Sat Mar 09, 2013 3:49 am

I did not play World of Warcraft, but I find that it is similar to online strategy and interaction games. I was playing online Survivor on Facebook. The more you invest in the game, the more successful you can be because of your interactions and challenge wins. You could also give confessionals where you could get coins for items. Now, if anyone has seen Survivor, you know how tough it is mentally and imagine on Facebook. When things were going great in the game, I was having fun and I was very happy. When I got any kind of backlash, I would get upset. I joined these games mostly because of the social aspect and to make friends. You will now see what the problem is with that.

Someone who I considered a friend attached a swear word to my name and showed it publicly to people when I betrayed her in a game. She promised that she was not done with me and that she would show me what a stupid annoying ***** I was. Her and her friends took my confessionals from a previous game and started quoting me. Alot of people who I considered friends were involved and I then didn't trust anyone online. I had extreme paranoia. I still continued to stay online, but my spirits were gone because they were even quoting my happy confessionals and I took it as they were mocking me. Why did I not think that they were just joking? Because of that woman and her promise.

Results? I went three days without sleeping. In those three days, I just had liquids. I used to eat everything I saw and exercise alot but I had no interest in eating, exercising, showering, cleaning my apartment, etc. I started spending my money that I didn't have on alcohol so that I could get drunk and hide how hurt that I was. I would take my phone to the washroom and check my facebook in there because my work didn't have facebook. I would get paranoid of getting fired from work and I had no patience for anyone. I didn't want to talk to my coworkers and I would get irritated with everything.

You want to know who the first person I called was? A girl that I knew from my city from my online games. I told her everything that I just wrote and she told me that I should go back to the game because lots of people were counting on me. Why didn't she just tell me to quit?? I got on skype with a guy from my tribe and I broke out in tears. I just couldn't handle it anymore. I could tell that he felt really bad, but why didn't he tell me to quit if I was just simply devastated? He (keep in mind that he was behind the whole quoting thing) was just worried about himself and about his tribe being down one member. He was someone I considered a friend but a real friend would tell me to quit. I then called my dad the next day. My sister told me that if I didn't quit my games, to consider her an aquaintance because I'm about to lose everything.

I immediately quit all three games I was in. For the first week, I had a pain in my forehead and I just couldn't focus at all at work. I even went on my trip to the Dominican Republic and I just wasn't myself at all Sad I wasn't ready for this trip because my gaming took up all my spare time.

I decided to deactivate my facebook account and keep in contact with a few people that I could trust or I thought I could trust. These are the people:

-The girl from my city who told me to get back into the game after I told her all that crazy stuff. She tells me that she wants to give me space because she knows I just went through something bad Sad
-The girl who kept me in the game after seeing me sick on skype and after I told her all that crazy stuff (the not sleeping, not eating, missing work, etc). She completely understood why I left and said she valued me as a friend.
-A guy who is from the games and who emailed me the day after I deactivated. He has missed me very much.
-A girl who completely understands that I was addicted and treated awful in these games. We talk about our jobs because we're basically trying to make up for not working much because of these stupid games. Yes, now I'm a workaholic working 50-60 hours a week.

There is a problem though. Every time I talk to them, I think about the pain that I felt. I feel like they are my old drinking buddies. I loved talking to them and we talked about things other than the games, but I know that our relationships aren't going to be the same. I really want to make these relationships work.

It's been a little over a month since I deactivated and quit those games and I know that I'm doing alot better. I work 50-60 hours a week, I exercise 1-2 times a week, I'm on a strict budget, I'm doing all the errands that I missed and my apartment is sexily clean. I contact my real life friends and family alot because I know that they're worried about me so I'm trying to let them know everything that's going on with me, even though I feel guilty that I'm not 100% myself yet. I call this online therapy line if I'm feeling very down and I tell them the same story over and over and over and over again. I don't want to bother my friends and family too much with this because I feel like they don't understand me and they would be disappointed in me for still thinking about those games. I also don't get drunk. Can't afford it. I drink water, milk, and free coffee at work now.

I think that's it lol.
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